I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize