Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
PANTIES FOUND
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