I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
My hand turned me down
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
