wakey wakey hands off snakey
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
