i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize