how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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