I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
