Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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