My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
