it was like his penis was on wheels.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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