Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
The ass gains better be worth it
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