Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
