You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
