no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize