they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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