I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Randomize
