i think i have herpe
just one?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
