I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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