So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You pole danced in your parka.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
You're breaking my sexual little heart
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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