just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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