Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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