I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
