that's an acceptable place to lick
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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