Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
