Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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