Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
