if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
