I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
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