its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
