If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
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