Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
