I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize