Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize