nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize