Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
