Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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