I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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