Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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