So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize