just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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