You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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