is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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