Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
