the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
