Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
We got so high we made milksteak
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
