Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
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