We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
