We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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