How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize