I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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