Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize