they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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