Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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